Are you living with herpes? Others are in the similar situation with you so you need not be afraid. Herpes is a general term used for the range of diseases caused by the herpes simplex virus. There are two types of herpes namely HSV-1; which is also called oral herpes and HSV-2; which is called genital herpes. Living with herpes should not feel like a burden to you, especially if you are dating. Maintaining a positive attitude is vital in making your life more enjoyable for yourself and those around you. Either way, you will have to disclose to someone that you are living with herpes, whether it is a friend or your partner.
Disclosing your status
So how exactly do you spill the beans without feeling embarrassed? Below are the steps on how to tell someone you have hiv or herpes virus:
- When telling someone you have the virus, be casual but confident. Instead of simply saying it, you can use a conversation bridge, for example, “I feel like we have a great future awaiting us, so I’d like to tell you something important”.
- Spend time with the person and let the person know you first; as you should not reveal your status on the first date. Disclosing such sensitive information on the first date is likely to ruin your chances of starting a relationship.
- Wait until the fourth date, and then you will have known whether the person is good for you, and he/she will also have known your good sides.
- Be reminded though that as you know your current health condition, you should avoid any sexual contact in these dates. These first dates are supposed to be your chance to get to know each other first, and be sure that the partner is really right for you. If you want to find true love or a lasting relationship you wouldn’t think of physical intimacy right away, right? Your first dates are your stages where you make adjustments with each other, before and after you disclose this sensitive health condition. It is even your chance to discuss with one another how to both deal with this, as you go on with the relationship. Be reminded also that genital herpes is contagious and can be transmitted when the sores are present. This condition cannot be cured but managed with drugs such as Valtrex, Famvir, and Zovirax, so it is always best to have a doctor’s guidance.
- Prepare yourself for any reaction, and do not take it personally. Just remember the problem in the attitude is not with you.
Even though you have herpes, you can still find love in the social media or in person. Generally, a person living with herpes virus may feel insecure because of the fear of rejection; thus, a zone where you can feel at ease is ideal and you can be confident in telling someone you have herpes virus. There are dating sites which offer this platform and joning them may be a step to a love-filled future.
As stated earlier, anyone with herpes can live a normal life (including getting intimate) as long as one manages the condition with medication and uses protection during intercourse. So what is the best way to tell someone that you have herpes before having sex? First of all, do not have that conversation in settings associated with intimacy. It is wise to tell them as soon as possible so that they can know what they are getting into.
Moreover, you should not have intimacy when the sores are open to avoid infecting your partner. When the sores are open, mutual masturbation can be a way to relieve the sexual tension.
Everyone deserves a chance at dating and marriage, including those living with sexually transmitted diseases. Get out there and find that chance.